الوسم: love

I am sorry I can’t introduce myself right now, because I am running.

The sun has not set yet but it is dark. There are dark clouds all over the sky and they are filling the air with water. It seems as if today they are going to cry all of their tears away. I am trying to run as fast as I can but the rain is faster than me. So far it hasn’t let me win. The wind and rain are trying to stop me but I am not going to let them do that. The wind is firing the rain drops like bullets on my face but nothing is going to stop me today because today I have to reach for a place, I have to reach for my life, I have to reach for the bench; yes___ the bench.

I go pass the lamppost that is only illuminating the rain. I cross the road, jump over the wooden fence and land into the world of my yesterdays.

It was raining, but that day it was not raining to stop me, rather it took me to places. Places that I had always seen but I had never been there before. It was a very soft rain that fell like breeze on my face. That’s why I was not running, I was just walking. I had never met this park in the rain before. I used to stay at home in the rain. It was the first time that I had gone there in the rain. I don’t remember since how long had I been coming in this park, sitting on the bench under the willow and watching the sunset. It must have been a long time. It seemed as if the bench belonged to me, as now there was no one who would sit on that bench but me.

It was a wooden bench of a medium length. On one side there was a meadow and on the other face, just behind the willow there was a big pond. Everyday the sun would play hide and seek with me from behind the leaves of the willow and then would drown in the pond.

But that day, there was no sun; instead rain was sinking in the pond. I had hardly reached my place when I saw a girl approaching the bench hurriedly. I stopped. I wished her to pass by and not to sit on my bench. Or may be I wished her to sit on my bench. I didn’t know till then. But she did sit there and I was surprised. May be she sat there because the willow was the nearest ********ter from the rain.

It was after a long time that someone else besides me had sat there and it felt good. I turned to my left and stood under another tree, with no bench of course, from where I could see her. She was sitting there with both of her hands in her lap and her eyes wandering here and there but looking nowhere. She was interested in nothing I guess. She was only waiting for the rain to stop.

After a while the rain turned into a drizzle. She stood up and walked away.

I stood there for a while, staring at the bench and then walked on.

Next evening, after a long and tough working day, I went to the park. White clouds were playing in the sky like naughty little kids. It was about twenty minutes to sunset. I reached my place and____ there was someone sitting on my bench. Do I need to tell you who?

She was there again and I couldn’t believe it. She deprived me of sitting on my bench for the second time and today the sunset as well. It was the most beautiful injustice ever done to me. Now there was no other way for me but just to stand another tree and that’s what I did. When the sun was setting, a strange thing happened; I saw two sunsets, one in the pond and the other in her eyes.

After that day I never went there to see the sun sinking in the pond but to see the sun setting in her eyes. I had given that bench to her without telling her. And she, without knowing it, took it from me.

The days kept on creeping and it seemed to me it’ll carry on forever. After every hard working day, I would see her and all my tiresomeness would take wings and fly away. She was like that. She was not special but different. And what was that, that made her different; I could never have known until a child solverd my problem. He made her smile and yes___ that was smile. I had never seen her smiling before but that was smile all over her, on her lips, in her eyes, in the movement of her hands, in the wavering of her hair, in the walking of her feet. SHE was smile.

So far everything seemed like a movie but it wasn’t a movie. I wish it were so that I wouldn’t let the bad part come and keep it happening forever. Till then it did seem as if it will go like this forever but then the bad part came. It may sound despicable to you, did to me. Even that I feel cheap to say that it was people. They would sit on my bench. Cheap isn’t it? I let them sit on my bench, I didn’t object. But the cheapest part is that they took away all the smiles. I only allowed them to sit on my bench, not to take away all the smiles.

But, well, I could say nothing to them as they were not bad but they just couldn’t wait. They were kind of people who just do it. While I knew how to wait. I can wait forever. All my life I had been waiting for nobody, now I could wait for her. I could wait for her smile to come into my eyes, for her words to come into my ears.

I kept on waiting and things kept on changing. She changed too. She had become special, not for me but for others. For me she was still different. She was still coming to the park but now I could only see one sunset, that in the pond. I lost my bench too. Now there were a lot of people on and around my bench and I was waiting for them to leave. I wanted my bench to be left alone, just with her. But how to make them leave, I didn’t know. The only thing I could do was to wait, that’s what I did and that’s what I am good at.

And today is the day. I had been waiting for this day. It is raining as hard as it can and I am running as fast as I can. First time when it rained I found her. Now it’s raining again and I’ll find her again. I am sure of it.

After jumping over the wooden fence, I land into the park. It is twenty minutes to sunset. I step into a little ditch full of water and lose my balance but I have no time to fall so I don’t fall and keep on running. I know they are not coming today. The rain will stop them. They are afraid of the rain. But what about her? She had changed quite some time ago. She wouldn’t want to come when no one else is coming. But I am coming, she will have to come. She is a brave girl, she won’t be afraid of rain.

Today I’ll forget everything that happened before. Today it will like the first time. Today everything will start all over again. The bad part is over and this time I wont let anyone near my bench but just her and I. While passing by an iron bench I lose my balance again and my knee hits the corner of the bench. These iron benches do hurt you know but my wooden bench never hurts. I don’t have time to feel this pain so I keep on running towards my place.

And finally I am there. Yes, I have reached the bench. I can see the place now. The raindrops are trying to hide it but I can see the place.

All the days of the past are scampering in front of my eyes. I am feeling tired now and I am feeling pain in my knee.

There is no one on the bench.

But its a little sad and a bit mysterious